We were mucking around in the kitchen early Saturday morning and she snuck up behind me and yanked my shorts down, all playful, like. I yelled and chased her a little and started playfully poking and grabbing her, too.
(Let me reiterate something here first... apart from the sex, the rest of our marriage/relationship is really good. Better than it's been in a long time, and almost as much fun as it was in the early days, 'k? There's LOTS of physical contact - snuggling up on the sofa, holding hands when we're out, kisses, hugs, etc - initiated by both of us. Even in bed. Only she stops dead just before it turns sexual. I'm not allowed to touch her intimately at all, and she very rarely touches me in that way. Damn, that's frustrating, but anyhoo...)
So, back to the kitchen. I'm playfully grabbing her and she (naturally) begins telling me not to... so I take the initiative and ask her why she doesn't like me touching her. Not just like this in the kitchen, but in bed, etc. She starts feeding me BS as usual, about being tired, about the kids, yada, yada. But for the first time ever, instead of being sympathetic to her, I carry on calling BS on her - until she knows that I really want the truth. She breaks and begins to tell me that it's because she...
...hates her body.
We couldn't talk much, because we had people coming round for the day later, but it seemed like a really difficult thing for her to say to me. And a HUGE thing for her to say, too. Can I just ask the girls a question here - is that something *you'd* find difficult to say to your Hs?? Is that something you talk about? Or not?
So anyway, it turns out that after having two kids, she's got some serious body image issues, which are preventing her from being intimate with me. And it's tearing her up just as much as it is me.
