Nicola I can whole heartedly echo your sentiments here except that my parents have a wonderul M. Yes my mum shouts a lot but my dad is so patient with her and they definately are still very much in love. They do everything together (although they do have their own space too). My biggest regret is that I did not manage to emulate what they have.
The biggest difference between my H and my dad is that my dad had 8 sisters and H had none. My dad learned from a very early age (only two of his sisters were younger than him) the ways in which women are different to men and he learned to adapt to that. Even more amazing is that my grandfather left when my dad was 3. Apparently he was a drunk and a wife beater. He left my grandmother with 15 children (although she gave birth to 18) and had at least 2 by his mistress. I never met him, they never got D because it wasn't the done thing (and my grandma couldn't afford it) and his name was never mentioned. My dad and his siblings respected their mother so much that when she decreed that none of her grandchildren were to have the same first initial and surname as her husband (so mainly the grandkids from her seven sons)they all obeyed her. My dad was even expected to pick up his younger sisters from dances even after he got M and he did it without any complaints. She was not a control freak, she was the most beautiful and kind hearted woman I have ever met and I still miss her a lot even though she has been dead for over 30 yrs.
Nicola you and I have similar issues but in our own time we will get there.
Me 43 XH 45 M 2.7.88 Divorce 7.10.09 Kids D20,S17 & D15
