Madonna/Whore Complex Part 4

[Heywyre]

It was an absolutely GREAT session and when we got home, the ST had sent us an article regarding his "detachment" theory and guess what? It was the EXACT article I had found with regard to M/W complex - so sounds like we are right on track

ST also asked us what we wanted to achieve in our M and what we thought was his role in all of this. I would have preferred H go first but ST wanted me to talk first.

I said that a wanted "a normal marriage with intimacy. It didn't have to be the world's version of sex three times a week, but I wanted the spiritual, physical and emotional intimacy that married people are supposed to have". ST seemed pleased with that response

Then he asked H and he said "I want the exact same thing W wants".

ST then asked what his role in all of this was and I said I would hope he could give us the "tools" necessary to achieve that intimacy. That is when he said he was pretty sure he knew exactly what the problem was, but he would have to look over his notes in more detail and let us know next week, and also what the plan of attack would be. He's a "go-getter" kind of guy and believes that people should be able to get things reasonably back on track in 6-8 sessions - but they had to do the homework, which H agreed he would be more diligent with this week.

So looks like he is definitely convinced H is dealing with M/W complex, although he doesn't call it that (prefers to call it "detachment theory". He said, based on the answers to the questions he gave H today regarding his family dynamics, H is a "textbook version" of the problem, he said he couldn't get any closer.

Then I had to ask the question,"based on what you say, is there any possibility we can correct it and achieve what we both want in our marriage" - and his response was "ABSOLUTELY"