What you are telling ME on this forum, is; "I'm asking him to come up with some of his own tactics and at least be willing to try them out on me without getting my "approval" first. ". Exactly what part of that would you not want to tell your husband?
I would tell him all of that. BUT, without the specifics, I think he sort of gets overwhlemed and resorts to his usual MO. That is where I lose interest. He can't seem to think outside the box (no pun intended, lol) as easy as many guys seem to be able to. This is the curse of having some very sexually adventurous partners in life I know it can be better but....
Again, he is TRYING so hard and I give him an A+ for effort. And his mind-set is also excellent these days. When I lost interest the other night, I told him I felt really bad/guilty about it because I didn't want to hurt his feelings. He quickly told me to not feel like that at all. That he wants to be the one to be initiating more now even if that means getting rejected now and then. What I should have responded with was that I wanted him to just push a little more. Is that unfair of me? Maybe. I said I was just not into it and he stopped. How do you tell/convince someone that what I say is not really what I want? And isn't that sort of F-ed up of me to expect him to keep going. But I do! Haven't quite figured out how to get that point across though. LFL
I know it can be better but....