I'm in the same boat as you with S4. I just tell him everything will be OK, and not to worry. Mommy and Daddy will figure things out. It's vague, it's semi-true, but it doesn't really get his hopes up.
The poor kid, when he found out I was going to be talking to my W two weeks ago, was jumping up and down cheering, I'm not even kidding. You'd think he just won the lottery. That broke my heart. So, I've been even less direct with him about things. He is only 4 after all. Any time the subject comes up, I just say everything will be OK, and we go play. It's a crude disraction, but he just can't be caught up in this mess.
It is heart breaking, just don't ever let him forget how much you love him and how important he is to you.
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
