To me, unconditional love is loving and accepting someone just as they are and for who they are. It speaks more to the core personality, the core PERSON. One of my biggest problems with my mother was that I never felt she loved me unconditionally. She never loved me for ME. She always wanted me to be, to act, like someone other than who I was.
So for me, unconditional love = acceptance of me, the person that I am, flaws and all.
mrs.cac4, thanks for the response. How do you as a parent do this with your child? My formative parenting days are over, and I know what you are saying here, but how does it work out practically?
I know I tried to express this to my child during her childhood, but I know I failed on occasion. I know some children are very sensitive to correction of any sort. So, how do you correct without the child experiencing that correction as a rejection of themself?
I encountered some of this feeling as an adult when NOP and I were working on our sexual issues. The feeling of "but this is ME, this is who I am!" and "I'm having to change ME!" was one I had to deal with often and the resultant resentment that would sometimes arise. Have you encountered this yourself as you and cac work through things?
