Thankyou all for the advice it helps alot. I'm sorry to read that you have sitch's like mine.
About the key thing...I'm not sure why I have not asked for it, accept legally it is still her house as much as mine. She has expressed wishes that she has left it behind & that she wants nothing from it. She was concerned that I would have nowhere to go, so as it is now, I am keeping the house. We were going to sort that out by legal terms but this is something that has yet to happen. This may be a fools trust, but I do trust her to enter the house at will, but I see your points that it's not right either.
Also on trust, we still have a joint back account that she has access to, this is short term & was too complicated to change at the time (Most of the bills are paid from this account) I did notice a week ago that money had infact been added to this account, she has put money in, it's a complicated story.....Loan that she took out to pay our credit card was paid from this account, one payment left the account after she left me. I did question it but got the excuse it was insurance that we pay. So for whatever reason, she put the money back into the account.
All of this seems to make my sitch more crazy to me, it's as if she still shows concern for me by wanting to keep the worry of debt from me. She's left a house that we worked so hard for & wants nothing from it, she seems happy that i am able to continue to live here.
With the contact thing..I'm not going to cut ties in full, but I think the best thing for me is to call now & then & test the water. Up to now that does'nt seem to have gone to far wrong, we are talking friendly, as I have said, so it's sort of progress or at least it's not got worse. I will keep posting here & spewing out my dribble as it does help to just get it off my chest.
Thanks again for the adivice & I wish you all the best with your own situations too.
