Madonna/Whore Complex Part 4

[Crazy Eddie]

Yeah, that all makes sense.

Your previous successes have all come from holding his feet to the fire. It was not the optimal solution, just the only one available at the time.

Now someone else, the therapist, seems willing and able to hold his feet to the fire. Let him do that and see how H responds, while you give up that role that you'll need to end up discarding anyway before you can consider your problems solved.

[Heywyre]

The only reason I was "holding his feet to the fire" in this situation is because it was MY homework too and I can't follow through on it without his cooperation now can I?

I talked to him about it Wednesday, and reminded him on the weekend. The rest is up to him. I am not about to pressure him any further. I will tell the ST what I have done to try and do MY part, what happens after that is anyone's guess but if I was a betting woman, I would say the ST is going to tell him to either step up to the plate and do what is assigned to him or don't bother wasting his time.

[COG]

Heywyre,

Better check out my thread! We had some very positive things happen last night. I'm happy/sad to say I beat you to the starting line. Now it's your turn.
COG'sTHREAD

Love,

COG

[Heywyre]

Yes, I just posted on your thread - but congrats, once again

You lucky dog!

[Heywyre]

Journaling

Surprise, surprise ... H still has not done a damn thing with regard to the homework ST gave us. He has been concerned with his new toy (the jeep), reading the paper, catching up on paperwork, balancing the cheque book - you name it. Everything else but!!

Well, he has to work tonight and won't be home until about 2 pm tomorrow, and then he will be sleeping. My guess is, even if he doesn't have to work the next day, he is NOT going to have the time or the energy to do the homework and we go see ST Friday afternoon

Should be an interesting session I would think

[Greeneyedlass]

Yep, it should be an interesting session. You knew he wouldn't follow through on this one though, probably hoped he would...but knew deep down he'd avoid it.

I'm sure though that this ST you guys have is going to address this, and I'm sure too...he's expecting that your H will have not done the homework.

[Heywyre]

I bet you are right GEL

The ST isn't one to take this lightly and I won't be doing any covering up for him either so we will see how things go.

On another note there was a baby step this week.

We were purchasing the insurance for our jeep at the local auto insurance dealer and this young, pretty looking thing had to go outside with H to check the VIN on the vehicle. While they were out there (and this is H's version that he told me about later) she said to him "that's a really nice looking Jeep, I like those, maybe you can drop by and take me for a ride in it sometime?"

H's response was "ya, that's what I bought it for, to take people for rides. I'm charging $125 for half an hour" and she says "really?" and H says "ya" and says "wow" (which just confirms the intelligence level of this "cute thing")

Now I know she was infatuated by him because we were there almost an hour (we were having problems registering it) and she barely said a thing to me but was quite intrigued by anything H said and was laughing at his comments (like a school girl)

However:

(1) I am grateful for him telling me about it (and I told him so), as I wouldn't have known otherwise, but

(2) what is with H and younger women that they just seem to latch onto him in that fashion and constantly hit on him?

[OG_Lou]

GEL
...he's expecting that your H will have not done the homework.
Maybe Mr. HW is a dead-line guy.

Imaginary situation on ST day. Lets say your ST appointment is at 4P.M.
Shower together at 3 P.M. a little kissy face at 3:15, H looks at clock and says "we better get going if we want to be on time."

Homework partially completed but 'we" ran out of time excuse.

I am not trying to be critical of Mr. HW, just thinking of what could happen.

HW catching up on paperwork, balancing the cheque book - you name it. Everything else but!!
He sounds like an orderly person. Some people are not good at keeping up with the paper work.

Lou

[Heywyre]

Lou - you are right, to some degree. He is VERY orderly - almost bordering on OCD

He isn't a dead-line guy, he's a procrastinator and there won't be any chance of him showering or kissy facing at 3 pm because our appt is at 2:30 and I am working until 2 and just meeting him there.

[OG_Lou]

what is with H and younger women that they just seem to latch onto him in that fashion and constantly hit on him?

HW, did it really happen the way your H said it did? Nothing ever seems to happen like that to me. Of course with the exception when some sweet young thing is working on commission and is using her charm to be a good sales person. Example>she said to him "that's a really nice looking Jeep, I like those, maybe you can drop by and take me for a ride in it sometime?"

I am just guessing your H and myself too, see things through perception filter glasses.

H's response was "ya, that's what I bought it for, to take people for rides. I'm charging $125 for half an hour" and she says "really?" and H says "ya" and says "wow" My Impression , Mr. HW comment indicated young male like bravado.

As I read the above, I can take it several different ways. Not only by what your H said, but by what the insurance agent said.

I have two female customers I thought were flirting with me until I compared how they acted around everyone else. My conclusion is they flirt with just about everyone. Maybe the insurance agent is doing her normal thing. Mr. HW could have been charming/friendly and she was doing the same thing.

I am grateful for him telling me about it..
That is the good part. ^5

Lou