You said "All my younger friends that went to the soccer with us were bowling each other over to talk to her. But she pretty much stayed by my side for the entire night"
Remember how good it felt even though nothing was /is happening between you and the BF. But that fuzzy felling knowing the other blokes wanted to be you? Well think of that feeling when ever you are down or around your W. You will have a smile on your face but the W will not know it's not for her but she may think so.
I think of happy things that have nothing do with my sitch and I can’t help but smile I do this when I am around my W
Husband
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
Too true my friend, XXXX is a very nice drop. Would you believe that I only have Bud and Henies in the fridge, funny that, no local drops.
Also, I don't want to get a "ping on" and have too many and end up sleeping in in the morning (have to get up in under 6 hours).
But I hope it does wear off. Like I said earlier, it is going to take W a long time to get the D papers and home on the market, so I guess I have a few months (I reckon at least Oct) to do some serious DBing.
AndyV M38 W36 D7 M 13 years Together 17 years W wants D mid Dec 06 (ring off) W wants separation early Jan 07 (she backdated to Oct 06) EA revealed end March 07 (Nov 06 W first meeting with OM) Hallmark moment "I care for you but am no longer in love with you."
I think this event is what has made me turn the corner in regards to my own PMA and emotional detachment. I have been an emotional cripple (hidden from W) and my self confidence is fairly low (seeing what she has settled for in OM).
I even told her (wrong thing) that she could have least picked someonw taller and better looking than me, and that he should thank god that he has you as you are way out of his league, and if you were not in your emotional state due to me, he wouldn't have had a chance with you.
This was said a few weeks back, I have ceased all R talk and OM talk since then. You Know, if you were to look in the dictionary under "muppet" I reckon his photo would be there.
AndyV M38 W36 D7 M 13 years Together 17 years W wants D mid Dec 06 (ring off) W wants separation early Jan 07 (she backdated to Oct 06) EA revealed end March 07 (Nov 06 W first meeting with OM) Hallmark moment "I care for you but am no longer in love with you."
Maybe in the Aussie version of Websters dictionary does your wife's OM picture show up under muppet. Because here in the states my W OM pic takes up a whole page under muppet. This sap during his M was pushed along by his W. She even wrote papers for him and he put his name on them to help further his career. According to his W this past year he recieved a promotion and you guessed it his W was the one pushing him and helping him get it. She thought she was helping him out but I proves to me that he is incapable of making an adult decision on his own.
I'll let you have the picture in the Aussie version of the dictionary, my W OM has it her in the states.
Do different versions of Webster's even exist depending on location? I may be talking crazy.
They may have been separted at birth, with one muppet migrating to Australia.
AndyV M38 W36 D7 M 13 years Together 17 years W wants D mid Dec 06 (ring off) W wants separation early Jan 07 (she backdated to Oct 06) EA revealed end March 07 (Nov 06 W first meeting with OM) Hallmark moment "I care for you but am no longer in love with you."
Got a call from my W telling me that a real estate agent was coming to look at our house on Thu.
She is full steam ahead, now that the R with OM is out in the open.
She also said the D papers were ready.
She told me that her lawyer reckons the court will reject a 50/50 settlement, she said that her lawyer said poss 60/40 or 70/30. WTF
I had a fully paid property before we married, and paid off all her debts. I have never abused her, lifted a hand in anger in our 13 years of marraige.
She decides to get into a PA with OM whilst I am away, wants to sell our brand new home, disrupt DD, alienates my family, initiates Divorce and separation with no counselling etc etc.
She backdates the separation to Oct 06, even though we separated in Feb 07, now she cant wait the 12 months and wants to go full steam ahead.
I know MLC is a bitch, but come on.
AndyV M38 W36 D7 M 13 years Together 17 years W wants D mid Dec 06 (ring off) W wants separation early Jan 07 (she backdated to Oct 06) EA revealed end March 07 (Nov 06 W first meeting with OM) Hallmark moment "I care for you but am no longer in love with you."
Just to give you guys a heads up, the WAS ALWAYS takes a step down in quality and character when it comes to the OM.
Ask yourself this...... When you were single, was it in your character to pursue a married W who's still living with her husband and is emotionally vulnerable?
"It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare." -Mark Twain
I know the OM is not the problem, but I still reckon that if he wasn't in the picture, it would be a different story.
Even in Feb/March, she told her SIL that there was a possibilty that we would reconcile. But since this R with OM has hit full throttle, she is fast forwarding a closure between us.
Sad thing is, DD still has no idea. I am picking her up from school today, and taking her to soccer practise. She was so happy this morning when I dropped her at school (I have today off).
AndyV M38 W36 D7 M 13 years Together 17 years W wants D mid Dec 06 (ring off) W wants separation early Jan 07 (she backdated to Oct 06) EA revealed end March 07 (Nov 06 W first meeting with OM) Hallmark moment "I care for you but am no longer in love with you."
I don't really know what to say to ya. I'm pray in for ya. I have been doing allot of that lately. It is hard when the little ones don't have a clue what is about to happen. From reading your sitch it seems that you are the primary care taker of your D. Being that your W took a jump off the deep end, is there a possibility that you could get primary custody. She really does not seem interested. An ankle bitter could get in the way of the rock climbing time.
I feel bad that my sitch is going pretty good right now. The W just came home. She was supposed to be at her C. I really don’t know because I don’t ask her what goes on between them, I figure if she wanted to tell me she would. Any way she is in a good mood. Usually when she gets back from visiting her C she is mad. She even said the chicken I made for dinner was pretty good.
Husband
Last edited by husband; 06/06/0703:04 AM.
And if I claim to be a wise man, well It surely means that I don't know
I'm sorry to hear your situation has taken a turn for the worse.
I feel like in my own situation, everytime things start looking better, something changes in my wife and she takes a huge step forward. I have a feeling the OM plays a large role in this, as very little changes in the house.
She has even told me things like "now that you are the husband i always wanted, its too late" - I take that to mean, she has found someone else and thinks he's better.
Astimegoeson is right - the OM is always a loser in some respects. Men with things going on and things to offer do not chase Married women with children.
