How about her parents how are they taking it? I can imagine she is infuriated right now. I am just thinking, but do you think maybe this will just push her away more? She went from unsure about things to anger. This may cause hatred toward you. Like I am so embarrassed it is all out in the open I could never face his family or anyone again. I mean her family will always love her along with her children. It would be easier now to put you out of the picture. I'm not trying to discourage you. Just thinking out loud to what I may feel if my husband told everyone.
Here's my viewpoint on this. Most affairees intend to legitimize their relationship with the OP asap.
So, at some point in the future they have every intention of introducing OP to children, family, coworkers, etc. They keep things secret so they can manipulate what they want at the time they want it. They also want to manipulate the situation to make it appear that the OP had absolutely nothing to do with the breakup of the marriage. They keep the affair under wraps, start the process of keeping the BS deceived and they start explaining to family members that the marriage is having problems.
This usually take one of two tacks - it's no one's fault we've just grown apart or s/he is just impossible and I've dealt with him/her as long as I can.
So, the BS can sit back and do nothing proactive while the WS and OP spin their plans, on their own timetable in order to set themselves up in the best possible light - WITH NO REGARD TO THE BS and little or no regard for the children...
OR
Exposure takes the power of your life back. No matter what the squirming and squeeling cries may say, the reality is that the BS did something BEFORE the WS plans could be fully implemented. The parents, children, coworkers are told the UNvarnished, unmanipulated truth.
So, the squeels are all about having their fantasy plans pulled out from the shadows and machinations into the cold, hard light of day open to scrutiny.
The other option is to sit back and allow your life, your future, your children and their future to be permenantly changed while you do nothing because you fear the spouse might be driven away.
Spouses who leave and never come back after the truth has been exposed are spouses who were leaving anyway OR they are spouses who might stay in the marriage while never lifting a finger to recover the marriage.
