First, it sounds like the goldfish would have died anyways, and you may have prevented deaths to the other fish, but just try not to get too attached. Like I said, fish die so much easier, even when your doing everything your suppose to. And they quite possibly could have had a disease before you got them, especially being at a fair.
On your H. ya, same old convo huh. are you sure you didn't want to hit HIM in the head with a brick? We need to think of something for that "But she's just a friend" statement. Obviously he keeps trying to defend himself. So part of that may have just been being defensive from your questioning/attacking (not saying you were attacking, but he probably perceived it that way).
Hopefully you guys won't go thru that same convo again, but I have a feeling that he will say this again someday.
I know part of you wants to just kick him out or something, but really you have to decide what your going to allow-meaning allow for an alloted time to see if they are on the right track towards respecting the M- and then just deal with the consequences as best as you can until reavaluating. It really sucked for me, but I had faith that it WOULD end and I was not ever going to blow up about it, and I did have 2 very calm convos about it, and after about 5-6 months it stopped. I know that seems forever, but I really think that it's like a drug for them. I think he really knows it's wrong, but is still trying to justify it, and I think he will eventually do the right thing, he's just in a difficult position with her as a co-worker. Of course he is an adult and can take charge of his sitch, but just because they came back, doesn't necessarilly mean the "crazy" part of their brain is all fixed just like that.
Now that you talked about it again, I think you need to really refrain from doing it for a while. Otherwise he's going to just feel constrained and pressured and think, ugh she's never going to be happy kind of attitude. This may not be right, but you have to think, what can I do to give me the results that I want. So, either you could give him an ultimatum, or you could stick it out for a month GALing and enjoying time with H and see what happens, or you could continue to act upset about it.
IMHO, I think the first and last choices would only push him away.
Hope that was somewhat helpful.
And you are right 99.9% positive IS a very very good place!! Focus on how good next year is going to be!
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
We need to think of something for that "But she's just a friend" statement. Obviously he keeps trying to defend himself. So part of that may have just been being defensive from your questioning/attacking (not saying you were attacking, but he probably perceived it that way). 