Duty, love, and attitude

[Crazy Eddie]

I don't have to be afraid of people or of tasks. But sometimes I am. I need to act anyway.

Can I keep acting anyway for the rest of my life? I don't know. I did find it exhausting and unbearable not long ago, and then impossible. But I've learned, and I've gotten tools and medication, and it's time to go for it again and expect breakthroughs and success.

If that doesn't work, then it'll be time to regroup and try something else. Till then, I'll try proving myself to myself and get hold of some more of that self-esteem. I've already proven myself in many areas that I had once written off as hopeless. I had hoped that this would carry over across the board, but there's still some things that need to be addressed separately.

I love myself, and I want to be happy, and most of the time I allow myself to be happy, now knowing that not being happy is not a recipe for success.. I just need more belief in some of my abilities. Time to pass a few tests. Here goes...