What Do I Do Next?

[789]

If you think it is going to be a positive in her eyes, just say how you feel, it will be perfect any way you do it.

I wish I could put mine back on all the time, I wear when I am not around her, according to my DB coach and my situation she thought it was best that I did not at this time.

[Kim07]

Kausion,,

Wish I were in your sitch still!! About 10mons ago, I had an argument w/my H and we both had our rings off. We had a long talk, and I had said that it bothered me that he was not wearing his ring, of course after I had put mine back on, said it reminded me of his commitment to work on our M(went for me 2)!

So he put it back on and things were fine for a little while, then I saw it was off again,,he told C that he got mad at me & threw it at the car & it broke!! C said, well, can you still wear it? H said, no, I think I have to have it fixed, H got it fixed then low & behold did it again,,now I have the ring after H said he lost it on a camping trip(found it in his car in 3/07)!

Now, niether one of us wears a ring ,,,but H is now wearing the ingraved watch I got him for his B-day in 3/07,,,a step I suppose.

Wear it, for Gods' sake man!

Kim

[Kausion]

Thnks Kim07

Wish I were in your sitch still!!

I guess, I didn't realize that my situation is so positive... I'll never leave this board once I get back home. I am going to invite W to come on and post to help people out!

It is on now. I will see W on Monday or Tuesday.

H is now wearing the ingraved watch I got him for his B-day in 3/07

Funny how our spouses still wear and use things that we bought them for special occassions, huh? W still uses Satellite radio that I bought her for her birthday. She put up our nice pictures in her parent's house. Her favorite picture from our cruise in December 06 is in her parent's living room.

[Kausion]

Quick update...

Since W will be out of town with D3 Thur - Sun, I asked W if I could pick up D3 after work. She said, yes. I picked up D3 wearing my ring. I am not sure if my W noticed. She had her sun glasses on and didn't say too much. I will have other opportunities to interact with her. Will have lunch with D3 at her office tomorrow and I'll pick up D3 again from her on Wednesday. W seemed brief with me, not sure why.

[JR2007]

I wear my ring and a reminderband to help me NEVER forget.

What is a "reminderband"?

Is that like a rubberband around your wrist that you snap yourself with everytime you see a pretty lady or something?

Sounds twisted.

But highly effective!

No silly, like the yellow bands that Lance Armstrong sells for his "Live Strong" campaign.

Mine is custom, says "Live your covenants" between Alpa and Omega. It reminds me of my failings as a husband - the old me; and the changes I'm committed to making (and I am making) - the new me, to give myself and my W the marriage we agreed to (and even better) within the bounds the Lord has set. We forgot Him in our marriage, but I'll never forget again.

As for the jewelry thing, My W now wears some Tiffany jewelry I got her for Valentine's day that she refused to wear while we were still together. Go figure.

I don't worry about it, I wear my ring because I'm married.

[Kausion]

Doesn't Make Sense!

I put my ring back on yesterday. I picked up D3 and I am sure W noticed my ring. D3 and I had a good time together. I went to drop her off and W met us outside. I gave D3 a kiss and hug and said goodbye. I told W that I will have lunch with D3 tomorrow. She asked if I could just take her somewhere and not be at the office. It is almost like she doesn't want to feel guilty when people see me. She wants people to think that I just abandoned her and she doesn't want anyone to know that I didn't. I asked W if she had a second. She then had a confused or scared look in her face. I asked how if everything is okay. She said no and that she filed already. She said I should be getting something soon. She said that she doesn't want to be in this marriage. She said that it has been a few months and she is done. I told her that I have tried to do my best to respect her space and not pressure her. She then turned around and said goodbye.

She had the door open and her mom was on the couch. They just got back from a 30 day trip. I am sure that her parents were shocked to come home and find out that she impulsively filed. I was upset. Called and cried to my sister. I can't believe how she is right now. Everything has been good. She is always sending me friendly texts messages. She is friendly in person. It is like when I ask for something, she gets all upset. I think regardless we need to go to counseling. I feel bad for D3. She is always telling me that she wants me to come home. Now I am not coming home.

I guess I am DONE! I will DB, but I am letting go and moving on with my life. If my W wants me, she knows where to find me.

What do I do? Do I have any hope?

[789]

Doesn't Make Sense!
I guess I am DONE! I will DB, but I am letting go and moving on with my life. If my W wants me, she knows where to find me.

What do I do? Do I have any hope?

Sorry to hear this Kausion, but I think that might be the right attitude to take. I am not sure if there is anything else you can do, but take of yourself.
As for hope, that is a question everyone here asks themselves daily. I have read some threads in here where D was filed and they still got back together, so in saying that, I guess yes hope is always a possibility.

Good luck

[Kausion]

I am so baffled. I am not in denial, I just can't believe it. She seems confused right now.

[789]

I am so baffled. I am not in denial, I just can't believe it. She seems confused right now.

You would know her better than anyone, if you think she is really confused, then keep DB'ing. Get detached and all that good stuff.
Hang in there and keep the chin up.

Good luck

[Kausion]

You would know her better than anyone, if you think she is really confused, then keep DB'ing. Get detached and all that good stuff. Hang in there and keep the chin up.

Just the way she acts and talks to me, I can tell she is not done. I will detach and move on.