i do know his love language, and have in his own words, have done everything i possibly can and more. i have forgiven him for stuff with OW, in fact, i was still intimate with my H the whole time he was seeing OW. not easy.
i actually talked him "off the ledge" last night. did not lose my grip, just talked to him very plainly. he agreed that he might be feeling overly stressed out and that maybe once all of the financial drama is behind us, then things will be easier.
he is just very negative about our future. he fears that things will end up the same. he's just tired of all of the drama. not that there has been much. he admits that it's his internal struggle with all that has happened that is causing him to want to leave. he does not know if he can ever over it. says there has just been too much.
i told him that he has plenty of time. he can always get divorced, but we have but this one chance to save our family. he agreed to give it more time. he is just still so confused.
the moral here is: to everyone dying to get back into the same house with your spouse, BE CAREFUL. if they are not fully ready, it may be more difficult than the lonely days you are currently spending on these board. slow and steady wins this race.
