Yes, my wife has WANTED a separation since I confronted her 3 weeks ago. We can't afford separate living arrangements, I have told her in no uncertain terms am I moving out, and she's mortified at the thought of going to her parents. (In fact, she not only doesn't want them to know about OM, she doesn't even want them to know we're having marital problems, and that bomb is going to go off tomorrow when I talk to them).
The only reason she doesn't want a divorce is how it would "look" (appearances are very big with this woman), to her parents, to our kids. She wants to go thru the charade of counseling (D18 overheard her telling her brother that she was only doing it for appearances), and save divorce for when the boys are bigger.
She will no longer call that shot.
I don't know what I can do about the boundaries. She obviously doesn't care what her family thinks of her. All I can do is push for my staying here, with our boys, and trying to push her the hell out.
