NikkiB #15 (moving to Piecing)

[NikB]

Oldtimer... I know, I'm just so confused. Because 99.9% of the time things are SO good. It's like he's REALLY in the R MOST of the time, but that tiny bit where he isn't is just SO wrong. There's nothing OK about contacting PW (and especially lying about it), but it's 2 minutes out of every 24 hours. The rest of the time, he's being very loving, caring, devoted to "us" and I even see him actively fixing things that he needed to. Ugh. THAT is what has me confused.

All day today it was about thanks for coming with me, thanks for being here, excited that I came along racing. Side note... due to various issues we only managed to tape 1 of 4 races, but it turned out quite cool!! I need to figure out how to post it... the file's nearly 1 GB.

So anyway, my question becomes... how far do I go? I have mentally wavered between "just drop it and give him time" to "move 3 states away and start over." It's been THAT dramatic in my head. And of course at this point H has no idea I've seen evidence of all the PW contact. Do I leave a note and the phone bill on the counter? I just don't know.

Think tomorrow I will focus on fixing up my fishie (hope I can cure this fin rot, it's gotten worse today). And spend some time in the afternoon figuring out what I want to do next. I'm out of town for work Mon-Weds - kinda glad for the forced time to think.