Coming out of our "entitlement" ruts?

[RedHeadWife]

Zu, we've kind of become friends here & over email. OT's post was probably very hard to read, but also brutally honest.

Sweetie, I really see a lot of my "old" M going on in yours. Not the past stuff that H seems to still have issues with, but just that one of you needs to start making more of an effort. I understand that you FEEL like you are, but I think if you want to get to a better place in your M, you are going to have to swallow some selfish stuff and just work on taking care of your H a little more.

I got the BIG D dropped on me and I tell you what, I kicked into high gear as far as taking care of my M and especially ALL of my H's needs. I truly just don't see you doing this. Sometimes it takes one person putting in all the effort for awhile to get things running really smoothly. Then hopefully they will begin to reciprocate. I know that I actually got a lot of happiness just out of taking care of H and realizing what our R was missing.

I think you need to step back a little bit and see what more you can be doing to just take care of your H for a little while whether this seems to be the "fair" thing to do or not.