Well, "way back when," my motto was "you cheat, you're gone," but you never, never honestly know how you will react until you are actually in a sitch.
Sometimes I wonder myself why I stuck around this last time. Part of me feels weak at times b/c I think I was afraid to be "alone," but part of me also knows I was doing what I feel is right in trying to keep my family together for the boys.
I've seen first-hand how just H leaving for his deployment has affected the boys. I can't imagine what H moving out to D would do; hopefully I won't ever have to know.
I'm just down right now b/c this long-distance is hard. I'm not too concerned about him cheating again, because I KNOW for a fact that I would tell him to walk and not hesitate if he does it again. I know I will be strong enough, but the kind of "growing apart" that happens when separated sure isn't giving me any sense of reassurance that we will be ok. Like I said, he's being really loving and says how much he misses us, etc., but it's still hard. Especially when I still feel like I'm putting in all the effort & work.
Sorry, didn't mean to hijack your thread w/ my moaning & groaning.
Honestly, this is such a hard thing and no one but those of us who have gone through it understand the decisions there are to make. It's not cut & dry.
Have you decided what you want to do? Are you wanting to try to save your M? Is H still seeing OW?
Me: 38 H: 35 S4, S5, S10 Bomb 01/07 Wanted D - nothing would change his mind Numerous A's prior to D bomb; EA prior/during D bomb Piecing 04/07 Deployed for a year 05/07 Still Piecing 2010 M 11 yrs 05/10
