Jazz got me going on this, so I'm going to keep it going here:
Waiting 6 years to have a child, having him come and be the most amazing miracle I've ever experienced. The times together watching the sunsets in Hawaii. Cuddling on the couch at night after school or work and falling asleep together while the TV was still going. Moving together to different cities for my work and still just loving being together all the time. Waling hand in hand to church on Sundays. Carrying our new born son with us or taking walks with him in the stroller to now him riding his bike or scooter. Beach-bike rides through the neighborhood. Going on our first cruise and running around like crazy people to make sure we got to do everything there was to do (and STILL gaining 7 lbs in the process). Going to every movie we ever wanted to see together. Getting through grad school, buying our first house and feeling that pride and knowing we'd be together forever. Taking our son to the mall so he could play on the kids' toys, Taking him to his first movie and watching him eat more popcorn as a 3-year old than either of us adults had ever eaten. Listening to him repeat lines from Cars and cracking up. Trying to teach her how to golf. Trying to learn tennis together. Going to the gym together...
Playing in the snow together and having S run into the cabin faster than Michael Johnson because he thought there were Mountain Lions around. Going to the reservoir with friends and having the best time just being together - easily one of the best pics of the three of us came from this trip too. Riding a motor-scooter 41 miles in Mexico to see a blowhole! (The map said it was 20) she held me the whole way, I've never felt better. Going to a Mexican food restaurant in Dallas that had food so hot my W actually started sweating. Going for deep-dish pizza in Chicago and both of getting so fat, we thought we'd burst. Eating a whole 5-lb bag of gummy bears over one weekend snowed into our apartment.
Man, I can remember everything as though it was yesterday...
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
Holy Crap dude, getting our engagement pictures in Hawaii, I can remember walking on the beach that day.
Our wedding in Hawaii, our reception, she was magnificent she was so beautiful. I had never been happier! I really thought that would last forever, how did I go so wrong? Thank heaven for repentance. I hope she will forgive me some day...
Going to get shave Ice on the North Shore. Walking the beach in Waikiki and wandering into the "gay" section (still so dang funny!!!)
Going to our favorite beach and swimming with the sea turtles. Driving the Hana Highway on Maui and feeling like we were the only 2 people on earth.
On our cruise in Aruba, having a huge parrot fish chase my wife out of the water like it was a shark. Then having a sting ray swim up her leg, I've never laughed so hard in my life. And then watching her pride as the local boys all made a huge deal about taking pictures with her.
Oooh, going to 6-flags in CA and riding every ride many many times and her never getting sick and me finally getting sick going on American Eagle backwards. That was so much fun...
I want that back guys, I want it back NOW.
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
I saw love in my W's eyes, I saw the pain we've caused and gone through, I saw the longing to be back together, and I saw the fear and lack of trust. All of that gives me hope.
Gotta run, gotta go get the boy. We're going golfing for the first time tomorrow. Can't wait!!!
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
well, my S is 4 and he's swinging clubs made for 9-12 year olds like they were part of his body. He's an amazingly coordinates little boy! Should be fun (or funny, more like) to go play this afternoon.
I found this on the boards and really liked it:
Quote:
remaining open to reconciliation is very different from "waiting" in that you can make healthy choices for yourself and your children without closing any doors re. your spouse.
remaining open to reconciliation and having it as a goal is indeed very different from being frozen in time, pining by the phone waiting for her to announce her intentions, or watching endlessly for the front door to open. I'm realistic I think in believing that there will likely be many more bumps ahead, but I feel stronger than ever to deal with them as they arise.
There are lots of great reasons to try to restore love in a relationship, especially when there are children involved. Even if your marriage was lacking before the threat of divorce, there are good reasons to try to bring love into the marriage. You have been doing the right and honorable thing. You have been wise. Rather than give up your morals and values and question why a person would want to save a marriage, I suggest you tell yourself that you've been nobly fighting for something that is worth fighting for.
and
Quote:
WAWs assume that their husbands are to blame for the lack in their own lives - as individuals. Your partner wasn't making you unhappy. The truth is, the way you were interacting was making you unhappy. So you need to make a concerted effort to stop the bad habits, or you'll repeat the same mistakes next time! You will have to change. SO WHY NOT TRY IT OUT NOW - WHILE YOU HAVE A MARRIAGE!
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
Here's a great thought from "When your Prayers seem unanswered" by author S. Michael Wilcox
Quote:
Occasionally, answers aren't given or the the blessings we desire don't come or the trials we bear continue because there is no place in our hearts for God to put the answer we need. Life must carve or hollow out this place. The very experiences we are going through help to create these holding places. Yet He still hears our prayers and promises the resolution will come in time.
Are we allowing the place in our heart to be hollowed out for God to place the answer we long for?
I thought yesterday was a 4th watch day. Writing down the inventory of my marriage and remembering so vividly all those great times with my W and S - TORE ME UP! I begged God to make the pain end. It doesn't because I can take it. I am being refined so when my W comes back, I WILL BE READY! I will have that place in my heart carved out so God can place the answer there and I will never forget it. And my W will have the H she has deserved all this time, my S will have the father he deserves, and I will be the man I was supposed to be all this time (and knew it but hid from it.)
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
Well, My son is a natural golfer. He hit long putts (amazing actually!), he hit long (for a 4-year old) tee shots. He hit iron shots, it was really fun to watch. And he really enjoyed it.
I wish my W would have taken to golf like my S has. It's all he wants to do now, so I got him some wiffle balls to hit in the yard.
Anyway, fun day for the boys.
We can talk ourselves into defeat or we can talk ourselves into victory - we are creatures of our thinking.
3/31/07 - Hit with a brick, leaving the dent there...
(still so dang funny!!!)
