Why do these things happen

[789]

Here I am again not knowing what to do with myself.
I found out thru my IL's that my W's grandmother passed away early this morning. I do not know why I am mad, but why couldn't my W call me and let me know. I did call her right afterwords to give my codolences. Her grandmother was loved by all, even myself.
When I found out from the IL's they let me know that they would keep me up to date about when and where the funeral would be which was nice. My W never made a comment about it when I called her. So now I have to wonder if I go or not. I really want to go to show my respects, but feel if my W does not actually invite me that I probably should not go, it should be time for her and her family and believe she is the one that should want me to be part of her family at this time or not. The funeral will be small and only family for the most part and I feel that I might be an intrusion. Does anyone have any ideas or suggestions on how to deal with this.