Hope your day is going well. Thanks for dropping by with cinammon rolls over at my place.
(Yum, with icing!)
Can you tell I'm getting my appetite back after starving myself silly over my ruined marriage? Hee hee.
I realllllllly like when you ponder and suggest ideas. You are good at it. More more more!
Yes, journal! You really help a lot of people when you share your (heavy) thoughts.
That chapter in DR about "ask for what you want" was never in the scheme for me, for us. We weren't speaking, he was out there, and when he came home, he didn't re-commit. My needs were not in the picture.
The only way I'm getting them met is taking care of them myself.
I'm no longer bitter about that. It's my responsibility, and it's can become a pleasure, I think (now that I permitted myself to buy that cherry-colored guitar).
But if we were to work on our M again, meeting my needs would be part of the equation. Just how to do it? Your ponderings are apt, and valid.
What are you doing currently to get your needs met?
Here's the list of needs I copied from somewhere and organized in priority order for me. How would you organize it for you? Would your W's priorities be different?
I'm trying to meet these needs without my H now. I probably got too dependent on him to meet them for me over the years, anyway. Maybe we all do in our marriages, especially if we're together a long time. It can break you if your needs aren't met -- a main cause of marital distress, as we know.
Affection Honesty and openness Conversation Admiration Sexual fulfillment Domestic support Recreational companionship Physical attractiveness Family support Financial support
