Thanks, Matilda. Not many responses. It seems like all my old friends have taken a break or have moved on from this BB.
Not much to write about lately. W. did send some pictures of kids. I do not call her and she does not call me. When I reach her, It's upbeat and positive. Every now and again I call to speak to the kids and she answers. The calls are usually fine, almost friendly. I always end them first. Either I’m detached or have lost hope at this point.
Every time I see small kids and parent, it literally hurts like a chest wound. I am not going dark, but not pursuing through calls either. There are times where I hate W. like I’ve never hated anyone before.
I’m not quite sure, but being away and on my way to Iraq for a year has really helped me to get my mind off of it all. Of course, when I went home or when I go home again the entire situation will flood over me like tsunami. I do have over a year before I need to face that.
I can’t help but think: I know I really need to improve in a lot of areas, but her pushing for a D. is about the most self-centered thing I can imagine, but she has never been wrong in 20 years. Not once. Not one I’m sorry…….ever.
