Hi all,
Well it been awhile since I've written anything significant about my sitch, which actually has been puttering along pretty good all along. Actually, what delayed the start of a new thread for a while was coming up with the title. Posting to Jethro's thread today, I heard LL's "wanting to go home..." theme and inspired the title.

However, there are just those couple of things that just won't go away and continue in some form of nuisance, like a hair seen dangling from the corner of your eye.

As I wrote in my previous thread, Get out of jail FREE! , I felt I was able to stuff all my demons back in a closet, but there been some stirrings going on and I can't quite put my finger on them.

First a little background ... one year ago I was under the impression that my wife's state of mind is that we were working on rebuilding M after first bomb that she wanted a seperation in Nov. 01, but decided a month later to decided to recommit. (She picked out new wedding bands which I bought for Christmas.) So next week will be one year from her first attempt at a physical seperation when she stayed at a motel for a week.

On top of that of thinking about the above, this time of year always seems to bring on her worst symptoms of depression and she still has been having trouble with obtaining a steady supply of her medication. I've learned that intervene on her behalf only makes it worse, so I have backed off, but i wonder if its the right thing to do as she seems to be on the verge of a real bout of depression??
Then there's dealing with the increasing withdrawing and distancing.

Two weeks ago, my wife received a phone call from her best friend, in which the conversation on her end seem to take on a strange air about it with her friend seem to press her for an answer to somehting. A little while later, I asked her nonchalantly asked what her friend wanted and she reply "It's a secret, what I can't have those anymore?" I haven't heard that tone in over six months! and I was caught offguard by the question, so I dropped it, but its been nawing at me since.

Then last week, we were invited for an evening with this very friend and her spouse for the first time. We had a nice time, but my W and friend kept whispering in each other's ears like two little schoolgirls while I had offered to "fix" their computer. That just made this "secret" issue pop into my head again. What kind of secret does she need to keep from me? Last year, it was that she needed to move out. Is her depression affecting her present state of mind? As the visit continued, my W started to get more and more anxious to the point that she decided to cut the visit short and go home.

As this week goes on my W's spirits seem to be rising again and she is a little more attentive, but as LL says, "WTF?" ... is going on?

'til later,
KAW