Hey I know where you are coming from! I've spent YEARS myself trying not to make the men in my life angry with me, or upset, or disappointed etc, etc, etc. I ALWAYS put their happiness above my own and it got me NOWHERE!
"Lovingly Detached"...I think I'm gonna make myself a t-shirt with that on it! It's one of the best tools in my relationship arsenal, and I think others will say the same thing. There have been plenty of times that my H would react inappropriately to me for something and I'd react very calmly as you did...works every freakin time! I've even (get this) done it with my father, the man who single-handedly instilled many of my fears when it came to men, who would screech at me at the top of his lungs and is now responsible for me cringing inside anytime a man raises his voice to me....I did this with him the last time he shot off at me when I didn't deserve it....AND IT WORKED!!! I nearly had to pick my mother's lower jaw up off the floor LOL. I actually received an apology from my Dad, a very respectful one at that. It was a definite "slaying the dragon" moment for me.
