But if he did not have the item she wanted, I don't see what he could have done short of offering her money for another one.
And what would be wrong with that? Why not try to reach a compromise? Okay it wasn't specifically on the D settlement, but why not try to work cooperatively as a good will gesture and as a way to set a president for future behavior.
YOu two have a lifetime of college graduations, marriages, school functions, etc to get through and like it or not you will have to cooperate with each other for many years to come. How do you want that to happen--always as a battle, or as two people who care about each other and their children and are willing to do what they need to to have an amicable relationship?
The thing is, whether you had the grill or not, she was in a tizzy. It's pretty obvious to me that this was not about the grill. It seems clear that Santhony's X feels out of control of her life and wants to gain some control by demanding something back that she percieves as hers. She sees that everything else she ever loved or could trust is gone now, albeit by her own hand, and she is groping at straws to keep anything from her past life. Very self destructive.
Of course it is irrational and immature--that's no surprise is it? One of the reasons we learn to DB is to understand how to deal with these crazy people in our lives.
This was a woman you once loved Santhony. A woman you chose to have a family and children with and while the pain of her betrayal is unimaginable to most people, it is not unimaginable to me. Believe me, I have been terribly hurt as well. I loved my H so much and for the most part he was a good husband. I have called him every name in the book (and even some that weren't in the book) and have realized it kept me spinning my wheels It hurt me, it hurt the children, it hurt my efforts to move forward.
What I am trying to say here is that your X is looking for a fight. To me, it proves she is not happy with her life at all. If she were, she wouldn't give a damn about this petty stuff. She is battling the demons that tell her she made a terrible mistake on one hand and that you are to blame for all her unhappiness on the other.
She is injured and hurting. Empathy can be a powerful tool Santhony and I know you have a big enough heart to forgive her and wish her well.
I see nothing wrong with you changing the locks--I probably would do the same. It's your place now and you must have boundaries. Throwing it in her face however is not going to get you anywhere. As I said if you add fuel the flame it'll keep burning.
Now Santhony if you try everything to be kind and gentle and understanding and she continues to play the role of the crazy beyatch from hell, then you have to do what you have to do.
