Well, for anyone out there that thinks once you get D - the BS will end. I have news for you. It follows you around and never stops!!!!!
Stupid me - the nice guy again, allows my XW to spend time with the children in my home (XW signed Quit Claim Deed on March 28, 2007 / D final on May 10, 2007). XW decides that a portable grill that is mine is really hers. Well I had loaned it to my brother whos grill died on him for a party they were having - they had an immediate need. This grill is mine, so I think nothing of it and loan it to him. Well, XW realizes that the grill she thought she was taking was moved - wasn't. XW calls me at work and demands to know where "her" grill is. I tell her, last I checked, It was mine. I told her I loaned it to my bro (which is no lie - I did). She demands it back immediately because her brother got it as a gift for "Us".
Last I checked, it doesn't matter who got it for "Us" - it was given to "us" so we need to decide how to divide it. Unfortunately, it wasn't explicity stated on any D paperwork. However, neither was a large electric roaster she took without asking. To me, she got the roaster and I got this small tailgate grill - even just like it should be.
Well, she blows a nut. Remember, she is watching S5 at MY HOME while the girls are at school. She then says, I am loading up my van full of whatever I want to take. Remember, this psychopath has already moved all of her stuff out of my home. I tell her that she can (in a very non-DB way) "Get the F*** out of my house now!". She replies "After I load up the van with whatever I want!" Then she hangs up. Of course, she won't answer the phone at all. This is the 3rd time she has removed stuff from my home without permission ($150 painting, $40 foot spa, and now the $130 grill). This was the last straw!
So I leave work at 9:30 and drive 1/2 hour home. She is not there when I get there. Nothing appears to be gone at first glance. Then I notice - a set of expensive chef knives is missing (~$150-200). I call her, leave her a nasty message. She finally calls back. She essentially is holding my stuff ransom until she gets "her grill" back. We argue some more and once again, she hangs up telling me she will take whatever she wants.
I call the sheriff and explained the sitch. He says, unfortunately since I allowed her to be in the home, it is a civil matter. He did give great advice on what to do, sympathized with me as he was going through the same thing. His advice, call my L and change the locks immediately! So off to the hardware store. We ended up in another arguement on the phone - I let her have it! I am through being a nice guy to her. She ends up hanging up again. Whatever baby!
About 3-4 hours later, I finished installing the new locks at 2:30 when guess who rolls up to the house. XW. She gets out of her van, I am just finishing the last garage door exterior lock and deadbolt. She starts walking to the house and I tell her "You are not coming in. Wait in the driveway." She thought she would take D6 and S5 into the house to wait for D11 (who comes home at 3:30 pm). I let the kids in to go to the bathroom, get a snack, etc. Then ask them to go back outside and play. XW has to wait for 1 hour in the 85 degree heat. I tell her she will get her grill back when my bro returns from vacation (gone for 1 week). I ask for the garage door opener and old key. She says - "When I get my grill back." So I firmly demanded them - "NOW!" She gives in. She asks for me to write something stating she will get this $100 grill back. I did. She says, I will give you the stuff I took from here when it arrives back clean - "just like I had it". I replied I had no idea how clean or not clean it was before I loaned it to them. I told her I would ask them to clean it, but that I would do no more cleaning than they would do. If she wanted, she could describe the level of cleanliness she would like it returned in to my bro (who is a lawyer....) . I tell her I want my things immediately.
So she walks up to the house - she has the set of Chef's knives, some nice ceramic bowls and salsa bowls, the knife cleaning kit, and a pitcher. That bitch just went klepto on my stuff!!!! Whatever she could take.
I have had it folks! I could take no more. I changed my locks and that bitch will never set foot in my home again. She brought this garbage upon herself. She created this mess. She is sleeping with XBIL. Heck, I ended up in a 1/2 hour convo with my neighbor. I find out they are totally on my side. My neighbor even said she has known about XW R with XBIL for years. Said his car was at my house all of the time in the afternoon when XW was watching my niece there. Sick! She is totally sick! I told her today exactly that - "You are sick and I hope you get the help you need someday!"
I know, I shouldn't be fired up. But like my Dad - my home is my castle. I do not like my living space violated and she violated for the last time! She will be in my home no more. The locks are changed. She sets foot inside my house for any reason, the sheriff said I have every right to press charges.
Let this be a lesson to all of you. You know when people say don't trust your XW or XH. You want to know why you shouldn't trust them - here is the exact reason why. We all like to think the best of people. Trouble is, can't do that when those people don't even have enough self-esteem to think well enough of themselves.
I have calmed down a bit since the incident. This will cause some childcare problems for me now - but I have nearly resolved them all. No longer do I have to worry about that loose cannon in my home. She wants to see her children, then she can come get them and spend time with them away from my home. I hate I had to do this to my children - they love their home, their yard, their toys. But I am no good to my children if I have to worry and stress about what XW has taken from the home or done to any of my things. I wonder what she would do I had a key to her apartment. Bet she wouldn't be too fond of that.
I have to go now. This has caused a bunch of garbage for me now. Thanks for allowing me to vent away.
when guess who rolls up to the house. XW. She gets out of her van, I am just finishing the last garage door exterior lock and deadbolt. She starts walking to the house and I tell her "You are not coming in. Wait in the driveway." She thought she would take D6 and S5 into the house to wait for D11 (who comes home at 3:30 pm). I let the kids in to go to the bathroom, get a snack, etc. Then ask them to go back outside and play. XW has to wait for 1 hour in the 85 degree heat. I tell her she will get her grill back when my bro returns from vacation (gone for 1 week). I ask for the garage door opener and old key. She says - "When I get my grill back." So I firmly demanded them - "NOW!" She gives in. She asks for me to write something stating she will get this $100 grill back. I did. She says, I will give you the stuff I took from here when it arrives back clean - "just like I had it". I replied I had no idea how clean or not clean it was before I loaned it to them. I told her I would ask them to clean it, but that I would do no more cleaning than they would do. If she wanted, she could describe the level of cleanliness she would like it returned in to my bro (who is a lawyer....) 