I drop my panties and place one foot on the toilet
OK..how am I supposed to post to ISLH with this going on here (sweating). C'mon gals..it's been January for me. LOL. FIB
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Steve - Althea posted that on her thread, hence my own story there. It is hilarious!
ISLH - That's a good one. Too bad he didn't wax HIS "bikini line"!
Update:
We had our fourth mediation session today - almost done. The mediator just needed to iron out a few details and get some final numbers from us re. our investments.
Now, I need the house appraisal (appraiser came last week) and a legal opinion on spousal support. When I have those, I will tell H. If he agrees w/ them both, no problem and we'll go back to finish up. If not, he will get his own legal opinion, and then we will go back to finish up.
After that, the mediator will write up the agreement, and we will each take it to our Ls. If the Ls agree, we will submit it. Hopefully, we won't have to go to court. This is hard enough without that.
I've thought of dragging this out to slow it down, but since H has only been with this new gf for six months, I can't slow it down enough to get past the infatuation stage. In any case, for my own mental health, I would like to get this over with (the D, not the M ~ although it works out to the same thing).
I still pray for my H, that God will somehow get through to him. He still says he's an atheist.
I also pray that God will continue to guide me and bring me peace. I trust that he has a plan, and that he has a wonderful husband to whom he will introduce me when the time is right.
Good news:
I am mostly doing well, emotionally. The mediation meetings always get me down b/c it's just depressing to talk about how we're going to break up our family, but other than that, things are good.
I was thinking of dating a bit, and had some interest from a couple of men who seemed nice, but I've decided that I don't feel like it. I am enjoying my time on my own more and more, actually, and I don't want to waste it! I also feel that it's important for me to get this D behind me, and then spend some time getting used to my new life and my new financial reality, before getting involved w/ someone else. I want to really do it all on my own for a bit (w/ help from family and friends, of course!). I want to be in charge of my own life, and prove to myself that I can do it, so that I go into any new R with a real sense of self and the confidence that I don't need a H.
I still hope to get married someday again - maybe even to H! - but that will happen when God decides it's time.
Ugh, feeling down after seeing the ol' H - all tanned from his little holiday. But it will go away - the feeling I mean...also the tan, lol!
Oh, one more thing:
I sang in a fundraiser for D10's school on Friday. I did it for the first time last year as a GAL activity. I was so nervous, but they asked me to come back, so I did. The thing is, there are a lot of professional/semi-professional musician parents at this school, and the woman who sang right after me is an international opera singer!!! Still, I got a lot of compliments, and someone even asked me if I sing for a living!
The GAL continues...next thing I have to do is make an appt w/ a personal trainer and actually use my Y membership.
Love to you all, Nicola
Life isn't about finding yourself; it's about creating yourself My thread: Trusting God's Plan
Me 55; XW 47; 2 kids (S13, D11) Bomb 05/19/06 Original thread http://tinyurl.com/yg2ou2t Last anniversary 04/25/10, Divorced 5/12/10 Status: Loving father of 2 beautiful children;
Good post. All this sucks but we are getting through it.
Do spend some time alone to get back in touch with you. You know, we acted a certain way when we were "happily" M and we contributed to our problems like it or not. Then we DB and we became aware of our behaviors and worked hard to make changes. But that is like learning to drive a car - we can drive but we are still on edge.
So now is the time to find the real us - to *center up* so to speak. I am discovering that person in me and I see you are too. I am finding more changes I want to make but know what, I like the person I see.
On the other hand when the dating thing comes up please don't keep putting it off (I need not explain why, right?). And ease into it - there is no reason to get close too quickly. Next time we will KNOW what to look for and WE get to choose!
I'm just finally catching up on some threads...I was really glad to read about your singing at the school function. How rewarding, and what a great GAL activity.
I know what you mean about dating...if I was feeling any real pressure from nice guy I probably would back off...it just doesn't quite feel right yet. I liked Jeff's comment to remember to take it as slowly as you want...we know more of what we have to offer and what we are looking for.
I still pray for my H, that God will somehow get through to him. He still says he's an atheist.
When one knows that God would not approve of their choices, all of a sudden, they don't believe in God. My H did the same thing. I should have noticed something was wrong when H's Bible was not longer sitting on his night stand but rather put away in his drawer. Here I thought he finally decided it should be put away rather than leaving it out but how wrong was I? It was when he told me that he wasn't sure he believed in God that it hit me.
I like your plan to getting to know yourself better. Once you do you will realize why we all think you are wonderful and you will make some guy very lucky.
Hugs, ISLH
Me: 49 - S22 & S26 H: 41 - No kids M: 10/00 Bomb New Year's Day 2006 H living w OW 01/07; have baby 12/07 D final 07/07 Thread #9 - Hope Lives On
