Unfortunately, divorces that don't need to happen do happen. Why do they happen?
Different reasons...well, yes. But I feel a big part is that it is more than accepted in our society--it is encouraged. We either avoid and deny problems or try to fix them ourselves--without counseling. Then when it's not too late, but we think it is, we file for divorce. Many don't even go to a counselor as a last resort. To me, the effort begins with counseling...and yes, sometimes one or both put no effort in then either...they use it as an excuse that they tried--BS. Braveheart, you actually gave an excellent answer further down the post...
Quote:
our society has become so tolerant of poor behavior and character that many people have no shame anymore...
Quote:
Why do people get divorced knowing that the next relationship will more likely fail
Becaue they are the exception. It's different for them. They aren't everyone else. They aren't a statistic. And there are some who don't know the stat...and if they did they would go back to those excuses I just gave. Love sees clearly; In-Fatuation is blind.
Quote:
Men who are older are more likely to try to find someone younger. Why is that do you ask? Well, I don't have the stats on that, but I feel its because older men percieve younger women are more exciting and it makes them feel better about themseleves.
This is really what I wanted to address. This may not be a popular answer and you may not like it, but it's Biology.
In general, men have a greater problem with their wife's sexual infidelity and women have a greater problem with abandonment. So woman want the spouse there for protection and security, men want the spouse faithful for reproductive insurance. Look at the cultures where polygamy is a way of life--many woman and one man. He knows those kids are his--same thing with other animals.
Yes, we are animals and thus we are still controlled by our Biology. But we are self-aware. Cogito ergo sum. So what, self-awareness doesn't negate Biology.
Younger woman are in their prime child-bearing ages and sorry, but biologically that is the attraction--even for men not consciously wanting children. Older men are more mature and financially secure--they have sown the oats and have the experience and finances to settle down and take care of a wife and children.
Sure, technology and society have changed. Woman or men can raise a child alone. But we have not evolved at the same rate as technology...our biology is still that of the hunters and gatherers.
It comes down to the selfish gene. Sure men, and Braveheart in particular, you love your children whether they are yours biologically. That is part of culture and awareness, not biology. Biologically each gene wants to replicate itself--and could care less whether another gene replicates. Put them together in a single being and the being wants to replicate. Look at all of the animals who kill the young of a potential mate. The mate may then go into estrus faster, she can dedicate herself to his children and they have can survive.
And I'm not saying we are like this completely. We are more than the sum of our parts. We can choose. We live beyond instinct.
