I am guilty of the same thing, detach and GAL for a few weeks, R between W and myself get better, then I backslide and start asking more questions about OM.
Yesterday (after we spoke in the morn, and W was happy), I did a bad thing and snooped on cell phone bill online (DD and I did not see her Sat, Sat night, Sun, she got home Sun 11pm), and saw that she was with OM Sat night, Sun morn and Sun night, poss even spent the night. She said that she slept at her sisters house.
I rang her yesterday arvo, and pretty much made her tell me what I wanted to hear. She has denied any wrong doing and has tried to tell me that they are best friends, but there was no PA. After my badgering she said "Okay, if thats what you want to hear, yes I am in a relationship with him, now you can move on".
Last night she came home from Kick Boxing with a girlfriend and I cooked dinner for us all, we all watched TV and acted as if nothing had changed. Had coffee and then she thanked me for dinner and said "Goodnight Andy".
WTF.
So NS4U, don't feel bad about what you are doing, I think we are all guilty of doing it. I also think this is part of our "phase" and we need to do this for our own sanity. Unless you are kicking and screaming when you do discuss these things, and are being hurtful, I don't see any harm, it is all part of the process.
Now get back on the horse and continue. I am trying to drag the one week of good DBing to 2 and so on. My record is 2 weeks before backsliding. I hope that I can maintain some good DBing till at least June 18.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family, All the best buddy, AndyV
AndyV M38 W36 D7 M 13 years Together 17 years W wants D mid Dec 06 (ring off) W wants separation early Jan 07 (she backdated to Oct 06) EA revealed end March 07 (Nov 06 W first meeting with OM) Hallmark moment "I care for you but am no longer in love with you."
