Hi SD- I am new to this piecing thing, but I feel like I am feeling some of the same things you are. I see that you have been on this rollercoaster for a long time but just keep in mind that YOU said this just 2 months ago...
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Patience, a commitment to stick with it even when times were tough, realising that it's not all about me, that there were many things H was going through (now pretty sure it was a mini MLC) that I really had no control over.
So, that being said, you need to keep focused on your goal. I understand your frustration and resentment. If you truly believe that your H had a "mini MLC" then it sounds like there isn't much you can do except be patient, make yourself happy and appreciate ANY positives you can get from your H. I'm certainly no expert and I am having my own difficulties practicing my own advise, but hopefully my thoughts help you in some way.