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[123snap]

You know this is so frustrating, I feel like we make progress, am maybe gaining a little momentum and then zilch, or worse back sliding. This is truly hard, I want so much to feel normal about our R, but I don't want to push, I don't want to blow it. I don't bring it up, don't talk about my feelings, I just wait and wait and wait. I have been in such a funk all week, I know that I am responsible and that it is my job to take care of that and so forth, but it sure would be nice to have a shoulder to lean on. I feel like most of my support has dried up. My phone people have moved on, or are very busy right now, my Mom has been driving me crazy. No one replies to me here. I think my friends are tired of hearing about it when we are together. Mostly I have no one to discuss this with. I guess I need to just write more, always helps to get my feelings down. I seem to process them a bit more in that way.

I just feel very alone and sad, I miss my relationship and my partner, the one who loved me. I miss me feeling relaxed and happy.