W is nuts, and I need to detach......

[I_Surrender]

Sol, I think I may be in a similar place, thought wise, about the continuation, or non-continuation of our marriage. I have let go of some of my anger issues.

I would say go to counseling yourself, work through your counselor to help you with your issues.

If a D or separation is going to happen, it does not make much of a difference if it happens instantly or a number of weeks or months down the road. It will hurt the same, many of the same feelings will be there.

Take this opportunity to look at yourself, and make yourself a better person. It might or might not help your R, but it certainly will help you. You'll have tools to cope better in the future with or without your W.

For example, I have the ability to have had the 2 OM fired from their position, or at least make it so obnoxious that they would quit. 1st time around my DD was about to have classmates go to his/her work and beat the s..t out of OM1. Nothing would have likely happened to her and her friends. Angry, I still told her that was not the right thing to do. That would not make us better people. Don't get me wrong, I felt like it! BIG TIME!

I have realized this time around, the anger will poison me. It will haunt me, hurt me, and hurt my chances to meet others, should the R fail, and I decide to date again.

Good luck.