Well, right after I signed off last night, I wound up in a conversation with her about my career. I mentioned my concerns, and she already knew, in a general sense, what I'd been thinking for the past few days. She made suggestions, which I listened to very appreciatively, then she listened while I outlined my plans (which included her suggestions), and we talked some more and touched a lot and expressed lots of appreciation of each other.

She knows she's going to be taken care of, and I know she's there to support and help and listen to me.

It helps, of course, that I was not acting like Mr. Mojo, whining that I didn't like my job and sullenly shooting down all her suggestions as to how to improve matters and wanting nothing more from her than "you poor baby, just stay here and I'll make it all better". This is not a recipe for reassuring her or for improving my own situation or feelings. And I departed from the martyr attitude of previous years. The original martyrs died within a few hours or days and didn't make big hairy nuisances of themselves after making their ultimate sacrifice... they just quietly went and collected the reward that waited for them. If we wish to be lovingly remembered as heroic martyrs, we have to do the same. Otherwise, we just become a pain in the butt for everyone around us.

Last edited by Crazy Eddie; 05/25/07 03:24 PM.
a fine and enviable madness, this delusion that all questions have answers, and nothing is beyond the reach of a strong left arm.