Its so frustrating, I was even trying to be nice to him today, asking how his trip was and stuff like that. Well now I dont want to be nice agaon Heather
Now see I likely did something stupid tonight because Im tired of all the mixed signals Im getting from him and I TM and said that we need to sort some things out because he is confusing me. Im now thinking about taking it back and just saying never mind and carry on. What do you guys think? Heather
Do you ever get days when all you want to do is cry? I feel so lonely. Sometimes this is just to mech to handle and I dont know how to fix it. Hes not coming home I think I need to accept that fact,but I dont wnat to be alone. Heather
heather, I am so sorry for how you are feeling tonight and I've been there. It doesn't help you feel better but the truth is that you really have no control over this situation with regards to your H coming home. If his crisis and depressive states are just beginning, well, this could take a pretty long time. I know the loneliness. It is not a fun feeling. You can even be with a crowd of friends and still feel lonely. I can tell you that you have to grieve for what is going on with him, and do the best you can to take care of yourself right now. He may not come home anytime soon, but you can choose to leave the door open for him if and when he pulls himself together to be worthy enough of you once more.
Most of us really marry only once. First love endures, even unto our dying day. And we never really divorce.