"You don't make me laugh anymore" has been my wife's SINGLE BIGGEST COMPLAINT each of the last three confrontations we've had over the past several years!!!
But it's a damned-near-impossible chicken-and-egg, as CeMar points out. She doesn't want to be intimate with you, because you're grouchy and humorless; you're grouchy and humorless because she never wants to be intimate with you.
Having tried both at various times, I can say that while neither is remotely easy, getting yourseslf into a humorous and happy mood is much easier than getting yourself horny.
One side of this vicious cycle is easier to break, and it happens to be your side. You may or may not need medication to make it happen or to make it stick, but it is possible to find humor and happiness in almost any situation. Besides its potential for lifting the spirits of others and enticing them to deal with you, it will make things much more bearable if the person you are hoping to entice proves immune to your charms.
A positive and optimistic outlook is entirely different from denial or suppression. Denial and supression are responses to a belief that you cannot handle or survive some fact or expected outcome and are trying to completely ignore it to keep your sanity. What you want is a clear view of what's going on combined with the attitude that you can, will, and on some level even enjoy the challenge of dealing with whatever comes up. Yes, it's a tricky state of mind to get into and stay in, but it's still easier than making yourself horny when you're just not.
Originally Posted By: chocolateeyes
Personally, if my very future -- and my kids' future -- weren't at stake here, I don't think I could pull of the happy, humorous moments I've managed to drum up the past week, and even then, I'm only succeeding half the time.
They've always been at stake, you just didn't see it. Now you do. Work on that positive mental attitude and keep it up. No matter what happens, it can't hurt and has vast potential to help.
a fine and enviable madness, this delusion that all questions have answers, and nothing is beyond the reach of a strong left arm.
