so now your H is transparent, you are secure, but he see's you as his mother and can not have sex with you. I'm no PHd but I can tell you there IS a connection between the way you treat your H, the things you require of him, and the way he see's you in a sexual sense. These things can not be separated in a man's mind. You can not mother him, and expect him to see you as a lover. Mothering in this sense meaning, he does'nt always have to check in but only when you want him too, he is not to be completely trusted, he needs supervision, etc.
I think COG is making some valid points. Maybe it is because he is a man and can easily see how being supervised could be considered a "mothering" behavior and NOT sexy. So is it ultimately going to fail in the long run? I am glad GEL and Heywyre are finding some peace with the approach. But I do sometimes question the long-term success. My H has a similar view as COG I think. He has stated flat out that he does not want us to have that type of R/M. If people are going to do something like cheat, there is always a way to do it. All the monitoring in the world will not prevent that. LFL
