An EEG can't diagnose ADD/ADHD. There are brain scans for that (I'm not sure about the accuracy at this time, but they are expensive... Dr. Amen in San Diego is a specialist in this, and UCLA Brainmatters... you might be able to find websites...).
In the meantime... well... if your husband is willing you can do some med trials. I'd be a bit wary of Adderall (particularly if there's any OCD in his family), but maybe the dopamine would be beneficial. If there's any depression he could try antidepressants (which can help decrease obsessions as well).... Is he interested in consulting with a doctor? Unfortunately, you can't force something like this. Does he agree he might have a problem?
Other things to consider... people with adrenaline-seeking personalities need excitiing hobbies. Your husband should be mountain climbing, motorcycle riding, hanggliding, etc... maybe he can get a dirtbike and your family can go camping at a place where they are ridden. Try to think of exciting things the whole family can be a part of. Even if you don't want to be doing these things you can still be there to support him. Also, how often do you go out? Dancing, dating???? A big problem in my marriage is I'm a homebody and my husband likes to party. My husband's OW was a sorority party girl. So, I decided to challenge myself a little. I had to climb out of the box and find that outgoing, fun, interesting, "party girl" inside me.
I'm still me, just a little less one-dimensional.... and younger...
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
