HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[LisaLost]

Well I called him- hewas off today- surprise!!! I called his cell he said he is playing golf with his brother and ummm 2 other people who are just there to watch- that + girls oh well he said what do you want? I just told him to call later- he said he didn't have time later so I told him I had filed- he didn't say anything but- if you think i am here with females u are wrong. i told him that it doesn't matter anymore I just don't want to be married to him anymore- he is right it is too much work and we don't get along and I am not going to wait 11 months for himagain only to have the same thing happen. he just hung up on me.


GUys I am 31 years old with 5 kids, I can't keep playing this game with him- the well I want a family oh no it's too hard I am gone game anymore I am a human with real feelings and I want away from him- let him figure out his issues when his next string of relationships don't work out. I have to move on.

Do you guys think I am wrong here? Yes I am emotional but I have been riding this with him for over 21 months now I think it's time I got off the ride.

I hate that I did it- he should be doing it but he won't he wants to wait- well I don't- I guess I will be the WAW- I have too much going for me thanto sit around and wait for him to come home just so I can walk on eggshells and have to be scared that he will continue with his behaviors- Sure I messed up and backslid a little but guys you know what I realized althoughhe was saying the words- he never changed- he doesn't admit to anything being wrong with him at all- it was all me. I don't want that in my life anymore. I am wore out from this. I have totally lost myself again- my fault I know but I need to do this.

I hope you guys can find it in your heart to support me and understand where I am coming from

ANd guys I really wish it could have been different but I don't see it.

Holly- until I get back to work (I am a Realtor) I can live off my child support an alimony, He will be court ordered from my temp. request and I know it will be at least 3600.00- he has a very good paying job. So finances aren't that big an issue for me right now. I have been thinking about this for over a week- he blames me for him not seeing his kids then he doesn't show o get them or call to talk to them. Today once again he chose a golf outing over his kids 3 of which he hasn't seen in a month!!!!


love, lisa


Love,lisa