Sashaying thru Seperation III

[Dr LOve]

Heartbroken-
I want the same thing as you. I want My W to Want to come back. I want my W to want to give up the OM because she wants to. it can be no other way. No false hopes here.
MC -Sorry maybe desperate was too strong of a word. In my sitch its like opposites attract. The more I distance myself the more she wants to be near. When I was giving her all of the ILU’s and hanging around her she was more cold and distant.
It hasn’t been long that I have been in this sitch but it seems like FOREVER. But I have found that the more I try to figure things out the more confused I get. I really like the saying going around about “just smile and wave” I’m trying not to take things personally (but I know It’s hard not to)

I’m not driving this car I’m just along for the ride..

H

[theoden]

MC,

Keep it up. Your going to win.

Allow me to prescribe something: adventure.

Get passionate about something. Find it. What is your call to adventure?

Where is your wild side? Your dangerous side?

I'm an interesing person, but at the moment, I live a draining, routine, nice, boring life. I'm dying for a chance to really make a difference: climb a mountain, kick someone's ass, slay a dragon, save a boatload of orphans.

Thanks,

Theoden

[mcojh]

I have an idea on whose ass to kick.

I am not dealing with things very well today. I have some anger or unrest bubbling towards the surface that is driving me batty. In one breath I want to call her and tell her I am done, and in the next I feel like I am going to win.

I asked CW if she wanted to go to the local HS Choir showcase. This is something that I never would have taken time for in the past. Initially she was luke warm to the idea, attributing it to not knowing what it was. I wondered if she was hoping for a better offer. Today she e-mailed me that she wanted to go.

I am so conflicted. I am going to go work in my flower gardens. It sounds wussy, but it somehow relaxes me.

[lovelyolive]

..mmm..hmmm. She digs you.. Will you be wearing your skinny-dude hotpants outfit to the HS Choir Showcase??

[mcojh]

I was thinking about something sexier. Maybe a chiffon cocktail dress

[Dr LOve]

MCOJH

baby steps, don't move too fast..LOL

Husband

[lovelyolive]

Oh.. good thinking.. something more formal for a choral concert. You are a hoot!

[mcojh]

Seriously, if she really does dig me as you say, why can't she admit it and start moving towards something better for us? She continues to go along like this is a permanent seperation. She wants to do stuff with me, and then in the next breath she asks when she can take a picture for her apartment, she is slowly taking her nick nacks as well. Does that sound like someone who is unsure?

In a positive note, she stopped over to get something S6 forgot (his stuffed sheep he sleeps with). They were on their way to go for a walk in the park. I was so tempted to invite myself along but fought the urge and didn't.

[lovelyolive]

Good for you for not inviting yourself. Mc - she digs you.. she just doesn't get how much yet. Think about it - she's doing 2 completely opposite things - "dating" you and leaving you.. hmmm... Right now it seems like the separation gives her some control over your R. Maybe that's just what she needs for the moment.

[mcojh]

Well I told CW to call me last night about the concert today. She called at 8:30 just as I was going out the door to meet a friend for a beer. I contemplated answering, so I could tell her where I was going, but I ignored it. This morning she called. I answered and she was irritated, because she called last night, and this morning called the house and my cell but got no answer. I simply told her I didn't hear the phone. We discussed our plans and I ended the call quickly. Unfortunately I had to quick call her back and confirm a time for picking S15 up, but that was short.

The game is afoot.