Here I go getting frustrated again. My H, who is an attorney, has had pretty much back to back trials in the last couple of months. When he goes into "trial mode", he doesn't seem to think about much else. He started the latest trial last week and it was supposed to go until mid-June. My H called last night to tell me that the trial was going to be postponed for about 6 weeks. I have felt like our R has been put on hold because of these trials, which on some levels was okay because I at least knew the reason why. Now, I feel like there is no excuse not to work on things. When he called last night, I sensed that he really didn't want to talk but I went ahead and asked if we could anyway (I know, stupid me). He told me he didn't really want to and said he was just being honest. He told me he did have to go back into court again today to finish up some things and he would call me tonight to let me know how things went. I could tell that this was just his way to get me off the phone for now so, I called him on it and told him he didn't have to call me today if he didn't want to. I just can't seem to control what comes out of my mouth sometimes. His reply was "Are you trying to torture me?". I replied "No, I think you are trying to torture me". He accused me of not listening to him again and so, the vicious circle continues...We did end the conversation very quickly after that.
I just don't understand how he is taking baby steps. I don't feel like I am in any different place then I was 3 months ago when he left. Now that his time is somewhat freed up because of the postponement of the trial, I feel like he should be making more of an effort to resolve some of our problems. I know I can't push him to do this because it will have the opposite effect but I need to have some direction in my life. Today I am expecting delivery of a bunch of books that will hopefully help me through some of this, but if anyone can give me some words of wisdom or even a virtual slap upside the head, I would be very grateful.
