Yes - my XW moved her stuff out finally on Sunday morning. As far as I am concerned - good riddance! Unfortunately she will be in my home for a few hours a day until the children finish school which is June 11. I cannot wait for this day. I will be changing the locks at this time.
Life if good for me. I feel a tremendous weight has been lifted and my spirit free to fly again. I have always been a free spririt and really re-discovered myself last year. I felt really good into last year and the early part of this year. But the stress of my XW flip flopping and the potential for disaster in the settlement was horribly stressful. From Feb til just recently when this was final, the stress was really bad. Is my XW going to change her mind again, will she get angry then happy (I think she may be bipolar???), will she dis-respect me in my home again, etc. Once the D was finally completed and her stuff out of my home, I am feeling feel free to fly again Each day gets better and better and better. My life gets better and better every day. While I don't like the idea of hitting bottom, I have come from rock bottom and it is a good feeling to have life shining brightly and getting better every day. I know there will be down days, I would be a fool to believe otherwise. But with each new day comes new opportunities and experiences and a renewed sense of well being that I will be okay. In fact, I will be better than okay - I plan to be great in every way possible. I have so many great people in my life as well to support me and love me. As I said before, I have been truly blessed.
Last night, I made a campfire for the kids. We roasted some marshmallows, the little ones took showers, and then they were off to bed. For me, I went back to the campfire after they went to sleep. I had some things to burn - a few pics, a scrap book I had made my XW before the bomb that I ended up giving her after the bomb, some old travel docs when my XW and I were together, and a few other personal things from my M that I felt it was fitting to burn. It was a pretty spiritual experience. It was not a sad time, it was simply "me time". I watched as these old remnents turned to ash while I drank a few beers, ate some beef jerky, and smoked a cigar under the stars. I said some prayers - thanking God for taking such good care of me always, for my family and friends, for my new life, and yes - I even prayed for my XW and XBIL. I talked to my dad in the stars for a while - asked him for his continued help and guidance from heaven above. Other than the incredible smokiness smell I had all over me from head to foot from combination of the cigar and campfire - it was a good night.
I went in and cleaned up a bit. I even planned a nice dinner for my sister in law and her kids (she watches my kids today), my children, and my wonderful new friend - K. It is one of my favorite meals - Mojo marinated Pork Tenderloin with extra cilantro! I made the marinade last night and started marinating the meat overnight. It will be such a wonderful day - 85 degrees and sunny. Perhaps I will make a salad, some potatoes over the grill, and some sliced summer and zuccini squash. As I said - life for me gets better everyday.
I suppose it is probably time to move onto to a new area of this site. Soon I will head over to the "I am now Divorced" section of this site. Maybe I will just let my thread die - fizzle out into nothingness just as my M has. I don't think I will disappear from here. Perhaps I will let my thread go and continue to try to check in on my friends here. I miss you guys a little and hope you are all doing well.
Okay, rambling now. It's time for me to go. For those of you fighting for your M - fight as hard and as long as you need to. You won't regret it. Just don't be afraid of the outcome. I know I was. But God has taken care of me through out all of this and I was meant to go through what I did for a reason. I will figure this out someday. You will too.
