Madonna/Whore Part 3

[Heywyre]

Well, he got off the phone with daughter (much later than expected because she was dumping on him) and he initiated the balance of the conversation where we had left off, so that's a good sign.

However, he is still very reluctant it seems to release the information and said the cell company told him once the bills were sent out the printout information was deleted from the file. I find that extremely hard to believe, however it could be true. I said, "well it can still be accessed online" and he went into some great big long, drawn out conversation about everything but the printout. Finally, I repeated myself and he said "I don't know how you go about getting information about MY cell bill online when I never gave you the authority blah blah blah"

During this time, he was relatively calm and not getting too defensive but it was definitely sending up red flags again. He said "how many times do I have to tell you, I'm not doing anything and I will be getting my cell bills each and every month from this point on and if it takes you 1-2 years of checking, that's fine with me".

I tried to explain to him that it was not necessarily from "this point forward" that I was concerned about but last month when he went to the city where OW was and I couldn't get in touch with him for 3-4 hours. He skated around it quite well but I continued to zero in on that particular bill. He asked me if I was "obsessing again" and I said I wasn't (which I don't think I am). After all, I am quite convinced that once I see THAT particular invoice I will be less likely to snoop much longer, and I told him that.

Eventually he said that it was quite late (which it was - he has to work tonight and it was already almost 2 hours past his bedtime) and that he would give me the information either tomorrow or the next day that I needed to get online and see the bill I am so concerned about.

I am hoping I don't have to remind him, but if I do, I will. I know this might sound somewhat obsessive to some, but I have spent so many years listening to his lies that this is just something I have to do to commence building the trust back. I have confidence that once I see that particular bill, I will most likely refrain from looking at the bills hardly ever (maybe just once in a while, if I am down or something sets off a trigger in me) but I want to stop this for sure.