scared...dad in hospital ( again)

[Lord Grenville]

...rather than getting in touch with the real reason I am here, to be with my father and support my family, I am instead focusing on and critiquing the care.

Hi NJ,

Your presence at your father's bedside may mean even more to him and your family than you realize. Even without "getting in touch with the real reason" you are there, you are manifesting love and care by what you *are* doing.
And if I were spending hours and hours at a hospital, I would certainly make note of the quality of the hospital's healthcare as well. This attention is an additional form of care that you are providing.

Your father will be in my prayers as well.

LG