Piecing, 2 steps forward, one back, or more?

[25yearsmlc]

Scout,

I'll check out your post. Um, VERY interesting comment about not really getting the bucks until your 50's. H always felt "behind" whatever measurement he'd use for our finances. Like he was in a race and falling behind but I saw it differently. I've qualified as a financial planner so I'm not an idiot about money, but have much less fear of running out, than h. Of course, maybe it's a good thing that we feel and approach it differently.

The nature of your work and its' demands on you AND others, makes it an easy target for those who feel they've underachieved. In M's to doctors (or trial lawyers for that matter) It is almost a guarantee that the spouse will feel neglected unless either he/she is Very independent with their own passions/careers OR the MD is consciously attentive to his/her spouse. Both have to be very secure in themselves AND the R. That takes time. You know, the grass is greener on the side that gets watered...and time is in short supply with your field. Don't count on the money making such a difference in happiness. For some of us, TIME together is the real love language and for ME, if h gets more time off and earns the same OR less (that's right, "LESS") I say that is great. There's a great book on values and money called "Your Money or Your Life" and it speaks to this balancing act. My h and some other men seem to overestimate the value of money to THEIR FAMILIES...I know my d18 wishes h had stayed here for her last 2 years at home, MUCH MUCH MORE than she cares about the size of our 401k.

Also interesting about the wieght loss. Did she blame you for her being overweight, only to credit the trainer for now saving her? I will say that her weight gain might have reflected depression in her. It's a good thing that you are here. And despite all my comments, I have a lot of respect for your jobs. You DO work your butts off to get where you are, and frankly, you Deserve a good compensation package. But then, so does your family, if you kwim. Take care, keep on keeping on.
j-