My advice to you is just give him all the space he needs...I can't tell you how adiment(that word doesn't look right, oh well long day) my H was that we could NEVER live together again...it just wouldn't EVER work...he could NEVER be truly happy with me....etc etc etc...and blah blah blah blah...
So just leave him be...be there when he wants to talk, but just listen...avoid R talk and US talk at all expense...make up an excuse if you have to...listen and validate but don't participate...stop telling him you not ready to give up...making a deal to tell the other if filing for D...stop that too...don't mention the word...quit checking on him and asking how he is doing (btw, this is mothering and my H began to dispise it...my C pointed it out to me)....
You have fought a hard battle...and it does get worse before it gets better...my H also felt he had a nervous breakdown...and I agree...he was nuts for a long time...and is now recovering with the help of a Psychologist and Psycotherapist and medications!!!
