tonight went great. The ONLY negative thing tonight was that at first he said he didn't plan on eating anything tonight, but eventually let me fix him something. He seemed very normal, if not in good spirits.
After he had been home a short bit, kids weren't around and I said, "So did you feel like tonight was a positive session?" I can't remember now exactly what he said, but I think it was, "I don't know. (long pause) Yeah, I guess so. I really don't know." I said, "Well, that's good." He said, "How old do you think C is?" I guessed 24-26. He said "24. I told her I didn't mean to offend her, but we had already asked her if she was married, so tonight I asked her if she'd been in a long-term R, and she said no. I completely understand that everyone has to start somewhere, but I told her I worry about being interpreted correctly from someone who can't imagine a R of 15 years with a clouded past." I said, "yeah." He said, "She told me she understands and wants me to bring it up at the next session."
Other than that, pretty loving evening. I initiated sex and he asked me to "put him to sleep" like I used to in the first years of our relationship, basically just saying, "You're on a warm beach, you can feel the sunshine on your skin, imagine your feet getting very heavy and all the energy rushing out of your body . . . "
I have my session in the morning. I feel like going into an IC session in good spirits can be LESS productive than when I'm full of anger with a lot I need to address, but maybe I'm wrong on that, I don't know. Anyhow, I will address how both of us seem to want the other one to give first a little bit, my problem with expectations, his issues with the past and sex, etc.
Hopefully, some positive stuff will come out of it. Thanks for reading.
