I know you say you love her, but the tone in posts like this and the following:
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ I married MrsNOP because I loved her, but I was never infatuated with her, nor she with me. We both burned all that potential out living with each other before we were married. Much like you and your husband decided to get married due to pregnancy, we decided to get married because I thought it was the right thing to do, and MrsNOP basically went along with it. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
make me think you are highly motivated by doing what is right, what you feel is your obligation or duty (makes sense for a military man). But I also see that as guilt driven, other driven, shame based. Don’t get me wrong, I understand the value of duty, obligation, etc, but many people on this board get into trouble because of too great an adherence to this rather than following true love and your own inner desires.
Geez, Cobra - that's another one of your strawNOPs. I'm glad that there were posts from NOP when we were still alienated from each other that disproves the idea that he probably didn't/doesn't love me and is possibly with me because of duty, guilt and shame.
Here are a few excerpts of a search for "NOPkins" and "love".
"Ours has been dilligent, forthright (in all aspects except sex), kind and non-abusive. I love my wife. I love her very much. She is the ONLY woman I have ever loved. She is also driving me insane."
"I love my sweet wife very much. I am more in love with her now than when we married. I love her smile. I love to hear her voice. Sometimes sweetness simply exudes from her and is contagious to everyone around. She stole my heart many years ago and still has it."
"Sex with the one you love, your life partner, the love of your life, simply can't be replaced by sex of the casual variety. Period. Obviously, LL knows this and continues to persue her true love. I continue to persue mine."
" I can tell you something that I have discovered. History, with someone that you love, is hard if not impossible to replace."
And even when he was especially pissed and hurt at me:
" I used to see her through eyes of love. In all honesty, I saw the same beautiful 21 year old girl I married, every time I looked at her. I don't know what has triggered reality to set in. Maybe it is the repeated broken promises. "
...End of self-indulgent stuff...
So, I'm back to asking you why you are expending so much energy in trying to psychoanalyze us? And it would appear to always be with negative connotations. To what purpose?
