Aw, but Choc, you didn't care the least..you were just using that as a coping mechanism. It appears to me that both of you care but you've got to take the time to make lasting changes so that you do not fall back into crappy habits again.
If you find yourself falling into resentment, perhaps you can say to yourself that these changes are not for the benefit of your wife, or your kids--though they will certainly benefit--but for yourself. Being the man that you are clearly capable of is something that you've been shelving for a while. It will take time and practice and diligence for these changes to become second nature to you and your wife is right to wait to see if they are genuine or not. When I was sitting neck-deep in the resentment pot, the ONLY thing that would help me snap out of it was to continually turn that microscope inwards and look at my own behavior.
