Hi I have been following this board for awhile and think that my H is in MLC but I am not sure.I have been married for 27 years together with his man for 33 years. EA started Sept/05 PA Mar/06 I discovered PA Sept/06 H left for 1 day Jan /07 H still in contact with OW. H left 2 days Feb05/07 returned Mar20/07 stayed 1 week. returned Home Apr/10/07 left Apr/20/07.This time said in love with me, made terrible mistake and wants to save marriage.No talk of OW. Told me OW done, angry with him and insecure about me. R for 1st week great. Ow txt and phoned. H moves into spare bedroom, has tantrum, tells me I'm too controlling and manipulative. Verbatim to OW txt. Anger episodes with D19 uncontrolled flash anger.H moves into spare bedroom, find txt from OW telling him to do that. H says he will stay only be civil to me. Not true, flashes of anger. I detach and let go. Have conversation that validates H feelings and tell him to go be happy, no regrets no worries. H plans to stay until Sunday, 3 days from conversation. I ask children to support me in my bid to say goodbye to their Dad and allow him to travel his journey. Friday night H and S21 go to get movie. H cell phone vibrates with message. I look at message from OW. Says be careful of controlling and manipulating by family. After BBQ and movie H asks if he can slep with me. Nest 2 days wonderful. I see glimpses of old H. Ow calls Saturday am-- excuse that hsd vision something wrong H should come to her house today instead of Sunday. I say okay, help H pack. H leaves returns home Tuesday for telephone counseling session. Is very depressed and sad. Counselling is having H look at issues. H begins to spew blaming me for situation. " This didn't have to happen, if only you would have let me have a friend, I have been unhappy for the last 10 years, I just want to be happy, I have too many responsibilities, you and the kids are too much burden. When is it time for me?...etc" I lost it told him I find it ironic that he has been on a 18 month quest to find his happiness and bliss and yet her he is so depressed and sad. And now your asking me to take on the roll of your friend, essentially the other woman and she becomes your life partner.I don't want any part in that. You can't have your cake and eat it too. You have made your choice accept the consequences. In a month I have had contact through e-mails, txt messages and phone calls, last Thursday was the last contact. He e-mailed to say that he had recieved the lawyers letter, but he would not be getting a Lawyer at this time. He knows I will be fair and we can just use my lawyer. I thne find out that he has bought a 2006 Harley Davidson motorcycle. He came last Thursday to take my D out for lunch. Her comment was he is acting like he is 18 years old Mom. I have retained lawyer to undergo legal separation and put the house on the market. I have registered back into school to finish my degree and am moving to the city. I have not responded to his e-mail nor do I intend to. In the e-mail H was so impressed that OW would take him back 4 times and Annie isn't great how much she cares for me. So am I correct and am I doing the right things? Sorry this is so long
Annie I have let go, given in and gave over to God.
