SSM calling Blackfoot, come in blackfoot, Over

[NOPkins]

Cobra wrote:"What you state is exactly what I am seeing and it is that hypocrisy that irritates me too"

So, are you calling me a hypocrite or not?

-NOPkins-

[NOPkins]

Cobra wrote:"Both BF and Nop have revealed or discussed very little about their FOO (well BF has discussed his some in the past). Both have fared pretty well in their outlook on life, relationships, self esteem, career, etc., but the black hole of unresolved FOO still oozes out in everything they do, doesn’t it? You just can’t get away from it."

The above is completely presumptive on your part.

Care to cite an example?

-NOPkins-

[Cobra]

Nop,

No, I am not calling you a hypocrite. I am only saying that I agree with LFL in that there seems to be a hypocrisy in your advice to people on this board about how to work on their marriages after or during an EA or PA. You are the one who said you would break another man’s jaw if your wife cheated on you, and then throw out the marriage to boot. That is the example I had in mind. So does all this mean I am presumptive or that you are a hypocrite? I don’t know. Its just my opinion on this particular issue.

[NOPkins]

Cobra wrote:"No, I am not calling you a hypocrite. I am only saying that I agree with LFL in that there seems to be a hypocrisy in your advice to people on this board about how to work on their marriages after or during an EA or PA."

If someone engages in hypocrisy, does that not, by definition, make them a hypocrite?

Hypocrisy: the practice of claiming to have moral standards or beliefs to which one's own behavior does not conform; pretense.

Maybe you should try again with a different word. Try diametrical on for size and see how it works for you.

-NOPkins-

[Cobra]

Nice try Nop. Someone can make a hypocritical statement without being a hypocrite, or they can be a hypocrite without making a hypocritical statement. Label yourself as you please.

[NOPkins]

Cobra wrote:"Nice try Nop. Someone can make a hypocritical statement without being a hypocrite, or they can be a hypocrite without making a hypocritical statement. Label yourself as you please."

Hypocrisy: the practice of claiming to have moral standards or beliefs to which one's own behavior does not conform; pretense.

Hypocrite: a person who indulges in hypocrisy.

Again, cite examples, or do I just need to let you get the last word in so we can be done with this?

-NOPkins-

[SouthernGirl]

There is nothing hypocritical (or even diametrical) about being willing to help those that wish it save their marriage during/after an affair, yet saying "I myself would leave if I was in similar circumstances". People are different. Circumstances and marriages are different. There is no "one size fits all".

Nopkins has never forced his help on anyone, and always asks those that wish for his help what they want to achieve.

Which is perfectly legitimate. SouthernGirl has spoken.

[SouthernGirl]

[*whistle]
Wow SG, not only are you quite fetching when you are pi$$ed, but your rhetoric's acuminate is exceptionally well trained. If my bosom bore lifes blood, instead of this icebox, you most certainly would have left me shivered.

Dude, you ain't seen nothing yet. *friendly smile*

Unfortunately the rest of my diatribe will have to wait until after the weekend (you may commence crying now). I have several deadlines to meet, as well as visitors staying over, so no time to play on the computer.

To misquote Scarlet O'Hara: Monday is another day.

[Cobra]

Nop,

I already gave you the most recent obvious example, and the one that really brought out this discussion, IMO. What more do you want? Have the last word.

[MJontheMend]

Lack of boundaries. of course its easy outside of M. It was one of the things he asked of you, for a long time, though probably not in a way you wanted to hear it. nuff said. when you lose weight, breasts typically do become smaller. An observation is not always a criticism, you know.

Well, the lame thing about me is that I only care about looking sexy if I think the effort is going to get me some sex (Choc's wife and I would probably NOT be friends)and in spite of my H's comments my efforts in that regard throughout the course of my marriage(I did make efforts)were mostly in vain. His comments about "smaller breasts and "boring breasts" and "too nerdy to f*ck" and "too arrogant about the fact that you do look hot" were all meant as criticism or ,really, lame*ss defensiveness about his LD. He also didn't like my style of being sexy. He found it too immature and blatant (Type 7ish?). For instance, I'm sure he would not appreciate the tight gold t-shirt from Beyonce's line of clothing that I bought in Chicago this weekend (I really, really wanted the hoodie which had a giant gold zipper and a gold lined hood but it wasn't in my budget (sigh).)

A womans idgitty vibe doesnt feel very much like a collaboration, nor do tears, clinging, nagging, screeching.

I don't know what idgitty means. I don't nag or screech. I do cry and cling. But I won't be clinging anymore because from now on no man is going to make me cry more than once, either the moment before I kick his *ss to the curb or at his funeral.

Now that's the kind of brutal honesty that I can get behind 100%.

Well, I'm more concerned with the kind of brutal honesty I want to get in front of, so I'm looking for the guy who is going to be brutally honest about how crazy he is about me pretty much all the time and how crazy he is about my hot *ss on at least a tri-weekly basis. In exhange, I will be brutally honest about how unworthy (I stole that word from you) I find all the guys who can't be brutally honest in that manner. (I am aware that I might have to rent a dumpster to put at my curb to deal with all the refuse but I think it will be a worthwhile effort)

For example after we get out of the shower, I love to throw my wet towel over my woody to use as a drying rack. That usually gets a laugh. Its also an effective way to carry the towel into the bedroom, since hands are busy elsewhere. Then you can place it underneath her to prevent the argument over who sleeps in the wet spot. Always the gentleman.

You're right. It is funny and not erotic. (lol) Do you remember Barney? He once posted that if his wife offered him sex in exchange for painting the kitchen he would walk around all day with the bucket of paint hanging from his hard-on. I found that erotic but probably just due to my X's complete unwillingness to engage in handyman or sexual activities in order to please me. (BTW- One of my Matchmen has offered to come over and fix things for me even though I wasn't serious when I made the request. Q:Shall I be wearing my new Beyonce shirt when I offer him lemonade? A:Is he 6'3" and half Native American and did he say that he didn't consider sex that lasted less than 25 minutes worth staying up for? )

Im very curious about your innate drive to see the little boy.

Well, here's a good example from my recent dating history. I was on a dinner date with one guy and he ate all his food and two baskets of bread before I was halfway through my entree. To me, this was very amusing and masculine behavior. So, I smiled at him in a light-hearted manner and offered him some of my food. He gave me this boyish look like he was so happy and grateful that I made such a gesture and I was like "Oh f*ck. Watch yourself Mojo. Cow alert!! If you feed him, you're going to want to take him home and keep him. Remember when you first saw X naked and you thought 'Dear God. Has this man been in a concentration camp?" and started thinking about what kind of soup he might like. Danger! Danger! Danger"